I am at the end of 2022 preparing for dynamic change. I am confronted with the need to review this years challenges, face them and act to change and transform as a Human being, a Spiritual being. One challenge has been the downward spiral into full blown addiction after my Mothers passing. For the years preceding I had relapsed now and then and would recognize the red flags and not got too deep. I justified these periods as Therapeutic Relapses. Of course there are other dynamics that played a part in my relapse in 2021. My need to self medicate resurrected when I found myself alone in a 4 bedroom house and the subsequent psychosis I experienced for 3 months proceeding my Mothers passing and the recent breakup after 5 years with my Partner and her Son. I had reached a point where reality had shifted so abruptly, my thoughts could not leave my grieving. I had entered the sunken place of hopelessness except for my garden and companion dog Sheba which kept me.
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